dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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