Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
