Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
