Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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