If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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