Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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