Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
