U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I should be sponsored by Trojan
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I think i got beer on your cat.
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