Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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