Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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