No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
