discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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