Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
