guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
