just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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