Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
