How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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