...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
