I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
