I got chris browned last night
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
