sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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