The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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