hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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