I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
