That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
