My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize