Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
