glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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