We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
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