Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize
