Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
