haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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