There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
