i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
"it" just moved
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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