i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
