I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize
