Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
