I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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