They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
