Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
