is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize