i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize