My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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