return my video game
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
So vagazzling was a success
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
