I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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