we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
