i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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