she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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