i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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