just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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